No Chances, No Lies

What guys want you to know, but don’t have the… ehem, balls to tell you.
Express yourself. It makes us proud, even if someone thinks you’re wrong.
You look hot in running shoes and shorts.
Bare, tan shoulders are underrated.
Don’t give me the silent treatment. It stresses us all out.
Text me back with one worded texts and you practically just kneed in the crotch.
If you think I’m speeding now, you should see me drive when you’re not in the car.
If you’re truly interested in us, don’t play hard to get.
Shopping is a chore, not an activity.
Don’t leave your trash in my car. Please.
When I screw up, go ahead and tell me but don’t nag me about what I do wrong every second.
No question need ever be asked through a closed bathroom door if I’m inside. I love you less with each syllable you utter.
I’m hot for you, not your sister or your friend or your coworker.
My guy friends. Not only are they not negotiable, they’re your best sign that I’m not a whack job.
Don’t be afraid to ditch the makeup. Natural is sexier.
Leave the eyebrows alone. Plucked is not pretty.
We crave hugs and hand-holding too.
When you get angry over some stupid little pointless thing, I question your intelligence.
I love to show you off.
We don’t mind being told we look good. Just don’t call it a “cute outfit.”
If I’m with you, don’t go on the internet. I want to spend time with you because I love you, but that doesn’t mean you can take me for granted.
We love ponytails.
The first time? We’re as nervous as you are.
Make us laugh and we’ll want to hang around.
Sometimes we wonder why any woman would want to be with us, much less someone as amazing as you. So, thanks.
Anytime you cook for us, we’re happy.
We love you even more because you know we need to go out with the guys once in a while.
And we love it when you hang with us guys, too.
We have a keen sense of imminent danger. It sounds like, “Do you think she’s pretty?”
Never say, “I know you better than you know yourself.” Nobody does.
You’re cute when you accidentally trip or do something in a clumsy manner. Don’t worry, we don’t think you’re foolish. It happens to everyone.
Stop dressing like every other girl and be yourself.

What guys want you to know, but don’t have the… ehem, balls to tell you.

  1. Express yourself. It makes us proud, even if someone thinks you’re wrong.
  2. You look hot in running shoes and shorts.
  3. Bare, tan shoulders are underrated.
  4. Don’t give me the silent treatment. It stresses us all out.
  5. Text me back with one worded texts and you practically just kneed in the crotch.
  6. If you think I’m speeding now, you should see me drive when you’re not in the car.
  7. If you’re truly interested in us, don’t play hard to get.
  8. Shopping is a chore, not an activity.
  9. Don’t leave your trash in my car. Please.
  10. When I screw up, go ahead and tell me but don’t nag me about what I do wrong every second.
  11. No question need ever be asked through a closed bathroom door if I’m inside. I love you less with each syllable you utter.
  12. I’m hot for you, not your sister or your friend or your coworker.
  13. My guy friends. Not only are they not negotiable, they’re your best sign that I’m not a whack job.
  14. Don’t be afraid to ditch the makeup. Natural is sexier.
  15. Leave the eyebrows alone. Plucked is not pretty.
  16. We crave hugs and hand-holding too.
  17. When you get angry over some stupid little pointless thing, I question your intelligence.
  18. I love to show you off.
  19. We don’t mind being told we look good. Just don’t call it a “cute outfit.”
  20. If I’m with you, don’t go on the internet. I want to spend time with you because I love you, but that doesn’t mean you can take me for granted.
  21. We love ponytails.
  22. The first time? We’re as nervous as you are.
  23. Make us laugh and we’ll want to hang around.
  24. Sometimes we wonder why any woman would want to be with us, much less someone as amazing as you. So, thanks.
  25. Anytime you cook for us, we’re happy.
  26. We love you even more because you know we need to go out with the guys once in a while.
  27. And we love it when you hang with us guys, too.
  28. We have a keen sense of imminent danger. It sounds like, “Do you think she’s pretty?”
  29. Never say, “I know you better than you know yourself.” Nobody does.
  30. You’re cute when you accidentally trip or do something in a clumsy manner. Don’t worry, we don’t think you’re foolish. It happens to everyone.
  31. Stop dressing like every other girl and be yourself.